Elder Rasband: "Love Like Jesus" for Loved Ones Who Have Strayed
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Elder Ronald A. Rasband speaks to families who ache over loved ones who have left the path, urging them to give the burden to the Savior and keep loving.
Elder Ronald A. Rasband of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles gave this talk, “Love Like Jesus,” in the October 2026 general conference. The full text is published on the Church's Gospel Library. He speaks to people whose hearts ache for family members or friends who have turned away from the Lord or from their covenants.
You cannot force a change of heart
Elder Rasband acknowledges how many families share this grief, including his own. He describes the sleepless nights, the second-guessing and the many ways well-meaning people try to pull a loved one back, such as pleading, lecturing or sending links to talks. He says these efforts can widen the distance instead. Everyone, he explains, must choose for themselves to follow Jesus Christ.
Hand the burden to the Savior
His counsel is to turn that despair over to Jesus Christ. We cannot change another person's heart, he says, but the Savior can, and our Heavenly Father loves those loved ones even more than we do. Through the Atonement, he teaches, there is always a way back. He summarizes the Savior's message to those who grieve in a single everyday phrase: “I've got this!”
What Christlike love looks like
Love, in his description, is not stepping back or approving every choice. It is taking an interest in a person's life, successes and struggles, being present with open arms, and relying on the Holy Ghost. He points to Alma the Younger, whose father prayed for him for years, and to the father in the parable of the prodigal son who ran to meet his returning child.
Three suggestions
He closes with three ideas for finding rest:
- Let go of guilt, and never give up on those you love.
- Remember counsel from President Thomas S. Monson that a problem to be solved should never become more important than a person to be loved.
- Come back to Jesus Christ through scripture, the words of Church leaders, and prayer.
He promises that the storms of the adversary have no power to drag down those who are built on the rock of Christ.
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